Though meals shared with friends or with strangers in public strive to be Insta-worthy, indulgent creations, the food we cook for ourselves is dominated by different set of expectations. Food made at home must be efficient, healthy, or frugal. Better if it is all three.
Are you meal-planning? Are you ketoing? Are you budgeting? Are you juicing?
Nah, man. I’m just EATING.
The message is clear: any effort put into feeding yourself should multitask and bring you closer to becoming a capitalist clone that worships at an altar made of of celebrity-branded cookware. But here at 2GIRLS1COVEN, we believe in the power of divergent self-care. Taking care of your body in a way that brings you pleasure is a revolutionary act. It’s inefficient. It’s selfish. It’s personal.
And in this case, it’s fucking delicious.
This Valentine’s Day, ditch the company, the companies, and the calorie-calculations and cook for yourself.
1. Make your grocery list based on cravings.
Cravings get a bad rep. We’re supposed to be enlightened, heavy on the ~light~, and always want what is best for our body. But my body knows things that Jillian Michael doesn’t. It knows how much I love a salty marinara sauce. It knows the pure joy of the first sip of Dr. Pepper. It knows exactly what I need right now.
One of the best ways to make your meal everything you hoped and dreamed is to let your cravings guide you. Think about what you’d want to eat like you’re trying to pick a restaurant with your most indecisive Libra friend. Remember that deliciously cold, fresh ricotta on the bottom of the plate of lasagna at the Italian restaurant your parents took you when they were in town? Salivating at the thought of the umami goodness of those Chili’s honey-chipotle chicken crispers? Praying to the old gods and the new that the Thai place where you first tasted Pad Thai didn’t get shut down by DOH?
Get to googling and find a recipe that will satisfy that craving. Make your list, check it twice, take a hit off your vape, and run to the grocery store. You don’t have to buy groceries for your whole week. Tonight it’s about one delicious meal.
2. Everything nice.
You don’t need to own a Ginsu knife, butchers block, or gold plates to get everything nice. Do a KonMari scan of your kitchen for the items that you need that also bring you the most joy. Wash the wooden cutting board. Dig out the sharpest knife. Wipe down the one skillet that you swear makes everything taste better. Find your favorite plate and fork. EVERYTHING NICE.
3. Preheat and get baked.
Once you’re all set up with supplies and have propped up the recipe on your phone in a corner that won’t get splashed on, preheat your oven and get a little baked. Light a few hits from a bowl and put B’s banging soundtrack. Take breaks from chopping to twerk. Revel in the way your remoulade comes together. Quality check your ingredients when you get the munchies. Slow down to a stoner’s pace. Cooking is about the journey, man.
4. Clean as you go.
There is no bigger downer than cleaning while in a food-coma. As much as you can, wash things as soon as you finish using them. While you’re waiting 2 minutes for that beef to braise, wash those measuring cups. When the biscuits are in the oven, wipe down the counter. Make your post-meal mess as small as possible so when you’re done eating, you can revel in blissful fullness instead of dirty dishes.
5. Plate that shit.
We’ve all watched enough Chopped to know that plating is 73.4% of every dish’s score. Take a second to think about how you’d plate your meal if you were being judged by Marcus Samuelsson himself. Smear an artful arc of sauce on the plate. Sprinkle some sprigs of herb as garnish. Layer everything neatly in a bowl. Make it Insta-worthy but maybe skip the snap. This is just for you, boo.
6. Take your time.
Light some candles. Queue up Russian Doll. Smoke the rest of that bowl. Enjoy every bite. You deserve.